We keep trying to collide, crash into people in some way. Even when we’re far apart, wrapped up in the million things that make up the coziness of routine. But we’re seeking connection, even when we’re not. What futile gene is responsible for this widespread fallacy in our code? We are meant to learn how to handle aloneness, and yet all we do is search for someone to fill the gaps. The gaps in our conversations, in our daily timeline, in our thoughts so we don’t face the inevitability that is our mortality.
If you’re wondering what has thrown me headfirst into this mood – dating apps – the biggest cesspool of human despair with a great profile picture and a snazzy write-up. And that’s where all the good ends. I may be going for hyperbole but honestly, these apps make me go to my wit’s end and then jump from there into despair. However, this time, it’s different, this isn’t a negotiation, I promised myself I’d come with an open mind to these apps and if nothing else, get enough and more content to write about.
It’s not the douches, those are still rare for me, seeing as I’m just starting out. It’s the way you cannot connect with this interface, with this premise, you have to go against every real instinct of meeting a person normally – keep a scale to measure them against, gauge their words in a cup, and ultimately for what? Sigh. I am just sad that my world has whittled down to a tiny screen if I want to meet new people, forget dating, I mean even friends, or just human beings. I’m not even a crazy extrovert but there is too little humanity here, makes me feel like stuffing fistfuls of sand in my mouth.
I just want to…remove the screens, in every sense of the word.
insearchofthebeautiful 